Therapy, What to Expect
If you are new to therapy or have only been a few times or maybe it has been awhile since you have gone to therapy, you may be wondering, what is the therapy process like?
It is perfectly normal and okay to be wondering this.
The reality is that the therapy process is very individual and therefore it can look and feel differently to every single person. However, there are some things you can expect or that will be expected of you.
HONESTY:
The therapy process works if you allow yourself to be open to yourself and to your therapist, being dishonest with either yourself or your therapist will not allow for an authentic process to occur in which the therapist can really delve into understanding what your struggles are. Therapy is the one place you should not censor or edit yourself no matter how embarrassing or negative you might feel you may seem, it is important to be honest. Therapy is not about being judged, if you feel you can not honestly disclose to your therapist it is important to let him or her know, you may not be a right fit, you may need more understanding of the process or you may be just needing more time of getting to know him or her.
TALKING:
Yes, it is true you will be required to talk, but having said that, how much you talk and how much your therapist talks depends on your therapist. I have met therapists who literally sit and stare at your for 50 minutes without so much as a word being said. So you have to ask yourself what you want in a therapist, you may be okay just talking to someone for 50 minutes without much being said or you may want someone who gives you more verbal insight or points of view. I work in a manner in which I encourage clients to discuss what is happening for them, but I also am verbal and often chime in where appropriate. But regardless of your therapist you will be needing to share about yourself, you may think this is odd and it may definitely feel odd at first disclosing your inner most thoughts to a stranger but as you get use to the process you may find, and many people do that sharing with an outsider is refreshing and freeing.
INSIGHTS:
The process of sitting with someone on a regular basis will bring up many feelings and at times memories and realizations about yourself that you were not aware of. This may happen in the session itself or later throughout the week as you are going about your day to day life. The process of engaging in a process which allows you to uncover feelings and thoughts allows for other thought processes to come forth. This is also why I highly encourage regular attendance in the therapy process.
REGULAR ATTENDANCE:
As discussed below therapy requires a commitment to yourself, and that translates to a commitment to engaging in the therapy process in a consistent manner. Many people feel that they can come in once a month or for one or two sessions and they will have done all the work needed. The process of change, discovery and healing require more than just a few sessions and require regular consistent attendance, otherwise not enough time is given to develop skills, change thinking patterns, or allow ventilation of feelings. If I see you once every now and then I will not know you well enough to know what your day to day struggles are, what your unhealthy patterns are or how you cope with various situations and therefore will not be able to help you in the best manner possible.
DISCOMFORT:
Some people really enjoy therapy, sometimes however therapy can be a difficult process, imagine ripping off a band aid and scrubbing the wound clean with peroxide, that would hurt right? In essence that is what we are doing in the therapeutic process, really cleaning out those wounds so that they can properly heal allowing you to develop healthy coping skills and different thinking patterns. From time to time I do advise my clients that you will feel uncomfortable when addressing your feelings, events that have occurred in your past or your thoughts. That is a normal part of the therapy process and expected and should be discussed with your therapist when you feel such discomfort.
©Melissa Lopez
It is perfectly normal and okay to be wondering this.
The reality is that the therapy process is very individual and therefore it can look and feel differently to every single person. However, there are some things you can expect or that will be expected of you.
HONESTY:
The therapy process works if you allow yourself to be open to yourself and to your therapist, being dishonest with either yourself or your therapist will not allow for an authentic process to occur in which the therapist can really delve into understanding what your struggles are. Therapy is the one place you should not censor or edit yourself no matter how embarrassing or negative you might feel you may seem, it is important to be honest. Therapy is not about being judged, if you feel you can not honestly disclose to your therapist it is important to let him or her know, you may not be a right fit, you may need more understanding of the process or you may be just needing more time of getting to know him or her.
TALKING:
Yes, it is true you will be required to talk, but having said that, how much you talk and how much your therapist talks depends on your therapist. I have met therapists who literally sit and stare at your for 50 minutes without so much as a word being said. So you have to ask yourself what you want in a therapist, you may be okay just talking to someone for 50 minutes without much being said or you may want someone who gives you more verbal insight or points of view. I work in a manner in which I encourage clients to discuss what is happening for them, but I also am verbal and often chime in where appropriate. But regardless of your therapist you will be needing to share about yourself, you may think this is odd and it may definitely feel odd at first disclosing your inner most thoughts to a stranger but as you get use to the process you may find, and many people do that sharing with an outsider is refreshing and freeing.
INSIGHTS:
The process of sitting with someone on a regular basis will bring up many feelings and at times memories and realizations about yourself that you were not aware of. This may happen in the session itself or later throughout the week as you are going about your day to day life. The process of engaging in a process which allows you to uncover feelings and thoughts allows for other thought processes to come forth. This is also why I highly encourage regular attendance in the therapy process.
REGULAR ATTENDANCE:
As discussed below therapy requires a commitment to yourself, and that translates to a commitment to engaging in the therapy process in a consistent manner. Many people feel that they can come in once a month or for one or two sessions and they will have done all the work needed. The process of change, discovery and healing require more than just a few sessions and require regular consistent attendance, otherwise not enough time is given to develop skills, change thinking patterns, or allow ventilation of feelings. If I see you once every now and then I will not know you well enough to know what your day to day struggles are, what your unhealthy patterns are or how you cope with various situations and therefore will not be able to help you in the best manner possible.
DISCOMFORT:
Some people really enjoy therapy, sometimes however therapy can be a difficult process, imagine ripping off a band aid and scrubbing the wound clean with peroxide, that would hurt right? In essence that is what we are doing in the therapeutic process, really cleaning out those wounds so that they can properly heal allowing you to develop healthy coping skills and different thinking patterns. From time to time I do advise my clients that you will feel uncomfortable when addressing your feelings, events that have occurred in your past or your thoughts. That is a normal part of the therapy process and expected and should be discussed with your therapist when you feel such discomfort.
©Melissa Lopez